Thursday, May 04, 2006

Thursday Thirteen

What can I say? I'm a joiner. So here's my Thursday Thirteen. CAUTION FOR NEW VIEWERS. I'm pretty much always sarcastic. Thirteen Reasons to let your kids watch television 1. Floam. If it weren’t for TV, we wouldn’t have floam art all over the house. Did you know that it sticks to EVERYTHING? Did you know that you can let it harden and keep it forever? Thank you, floam vendors, for pitching yourself so well on Nickelodeon. 2. Birds and Bees. You know, if it weren’t for Animal Planet, I would never have heard my seven year old discussing the mating habits of [insert any animal you wish – they cover them all eventually.] 3. Language development. Crikey! (Crocodile Hunter). Mother of Pearl, Fire on the Poop Deck (Spongebob, of course). I’m goin’ ghost (Danny Phantom). There are so many I’ll just leave it at that. 4. Excellent taste in music. De-de-de-de-de-Dora. De-de-de-de-de-Dora. 5. Restful activity. Unchecked, mine could sit in a television coma for hours. Just think how rested up her muscles could get. 6. The information highway. What’s better than finding your kid watching an entire infomercial about thighmaster or whatever. Animal Planet has infomercials in the morning. Who knew? Now my daughter can worry about all manner of personal failings and plot new ways to spend her allowance. Who needs to wait for puberty? 7. Realistic expectations. It’s important for kids to understand that if their parents don’t buy them that Wacky Wigged Out Slime Spewing Jackass Doll, their parents don’t love them. Life’s hard. Get over it, kid. 8. Enhanced family dynamics. If you do let your child watch television, your conversations with disapproving family members get much livelier. Why agree to disagree when you can argue the educational benefits of watching The Animal Kingdom’s Most Extreme Farters or whatever. 9. Dressing themselves. If it weren’t for commercial breaks, Girlie would never have learned to dress herself in thirty-second increments. 10. Telling time. “I’ll clean my room after two more episodes, Mommy.” Such a smartie! 11. Nutrition. Quick as a monkey, Girlie can tell you the calcium benefits of Nesquick. Need I say more? 12. Multi-tasking. Thanks to television, kids no longer develop that annoying habit of reading a book all afternoon. “Put that book down and come have dinner.” Nope. Now they can watch and eat at the same time. 13. Attention span. Watching television finely tunes their attention skills. Where we might want to look at an image for longer than a nanosecond, they are all over the zip of information. Imagine how fast they can take in an art museum? Amazing. And I’ll bet you thought that I was going to talk about the built-in babysitter benefit of an engrossing TV show. Wrongo. But that is where it all starts, isn’t it? I was being pretty sarcastic here but in truth, I'm neither for or against TV. Anything in moderation. Except informercials. Those things must die. Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

17 comments:

TNChick said...

Never had the floam but my son wanted it, once. Is it really that cool?

There are good positives to read. My kids would rather be outside than watchin' TV (like me) but they do enjoy it.

Denise said...

TV practically raises my kids for me. Kidding!

Renee said...

Same thing going on here...except we no longer get the Animal Planet, so she's missing out on a lot of animal mating stuff.

fefyfomanna: Thursday 13: Interview with Darly...by you.

Carmen said...

Ha, love that they learn the birds and bees from animal planet. HA HA.

Undercover Angel said...

I agree with you - TV does help with language development. You just have to be careful to monitor what kind of language they are developing. My TT is up.

jennster said...

LMFAO- curse you woman for putting DORA in my head! lol

Melissa said...

The Animal Kingdom’s Most Extreme Farters... I am still laughing. Too freaking funny.

Melissa said...

Oh shit, and I'm with Jennster. Damm Dora. Can't stand that bitch.

Wendy Boucher said...

Hi Jennster. Glad you came by. I've been thinking about your post today all through the dinner hour. Hope I wasn't too much of a know-it-all! And if I was a know-it-all, I hope it looked good on me. :)

Christine said...

I think it's good for kids watching Dora and Diego. Being able to speak a second language now seems very important! Great list! Love Animal planet too!

Caryn said...

LOL! I love sarcasm, too. Still, you had some great points here. So glad we don't have to worry about how much TV to let our kids watch, since we don't have either kids or TV...yet.

Guppyman said...

That has me cracking up 9but only because I can relate)...

feedscott said...

Nanny TV huh? Works for me B)

Stephanie A. said...

Infomercials must die, yes. I'm with you there!

Pink Chihuahua Princess said...

I have to take this moment for a public service announcement. Mother's ...I HATE FLOAM. HATE. My daughter got some at the store and I spent the next week picking tiny pick floam clusters off of every surface in our home.

hehe :)

Thanks for stopping by my TT. Happy Thursday!

The Life and Times of - ME said...

Heh, Denise, my uncle has 2 INSANE kids, 7 and 10, and if they're ever hyper, annoying, hyper, or even acting remotely like they're going to start wrestling, fighting, throwing food, running around the house, [you get the drift] he puts in a movie, and they turn into lethargic lumps in their PJ's. I can't blame him, I do it occasionally to them as well ;].

Writer Mom said...

*I say "What the scallop??" ALL THE TIME! I talk like Sponge Bob, it's true. And my in-laws have no idea what the hell I'm talking about.

I LOVE THIS LIST!!!

I'm feeling sorry for my SIL, however. Nephew wanted nothing but floam last time we saw him.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea, btw? You know who.