Saturday, April 01, 2006

How do you define "pet"?

For me it's easy. Cat or dog? Pet. Anything else? Big mistake. But I checked Merriam-Webster's and it says: "a domesticated animal kept for pleasure rather than utility." So, going with the broader definition and her original intentions, I think we have to call the beetle, the giant mosquito thing, and the spider (named, in order, The-bug-Mommy-helped-me-catch, Gabriel, and Charlie) pets. She caught them today after releasing Ron the spider who had survived his day of captivity. Okay, they are pets. She got them what she believed passed for food; she named them, she toted them around in a container; and she even put a label on the container just like a dog would wear a tag: If lost, please return to... kind of stuff. If you read yesterday's post, you know that she had burial plots reserved for them already. Enter the lizard. After buying new shoes for the big father/daughter dance tonight, Girlie found herself with a shoe box. Next thing you know, she'd caught her first lizard. The war on nature is escalating around here. Girlie and Hubby read about keeping lizards on the computer and by now you know where this is going. What do lizards eat? Bugs. What did Girlie have a surplus of? Bugs. Only, as I have explained, these were pets. Were. Pets. I hope they didn't know what was going to happen to them. I wont let her bring the lizard into the house so one at a time, she gazed into her little tub-'o-death and said, "Hmm, what are we going to do about you?" Stomp, stomp, stomp out to the kitchen. Door slam! Plop! Into the lizard box they went. The-bug-Mommy-helped-me-get went first but Gabriel and Charlie didn't last much longer. Actually, Gabriel managed to escape but the intent to feed him to the lizard was there. Before long, Girlie's going to need a coliseum. Let's just hope she never gets a permit to keep wild animals. I'll rest easier knowing that my cats outweigh my dog and aren't in any immediate danger should Girlie get any wild ideas.

3 comments:

Blog-o-licious said...

OMG, just hope Girlie's tolerance of snakes don't become a need/want thing for a pet. I hate snakes probably more than you do.
My biggest fear...going to the dentist and finding out she has a terrarium with snakes in it. Did I mention I don't like going to the dentist....euuuw!

Evel said...

They call them pet because you "PET" them.

Petting a spider? That's just creepy, and I believe potentially fatal for the spider.

L said...

reminds me of my childhood :)